Brotassium Man is not like any other superhero you have ever seen. Is he fast? Well...no. Is he strong and brave? Yeah well not either those either. Can he give anyone between the ages of 45 and 81 a mild stroke? Why yes, yes he can! While potassium can help prevent people from having a stroke, Brotassium Man can give make people have a stroke! What else can he do? Oh, that is a good question isn't it! More like what can't he do...well he can't do a lot. Potassium is the softest element on the periodic table, is it not? Well Brotassium Man can touch any unripe fruit and make it soft. Thats right. You heard me right any fruit, and I'm not just talking about peaches, he can ripen mangos and apples too. Now, I'm sure you are all asking the same question, how is Brotassium man so amazing? Well, I'm going to ask you to stop asking that question. Okay, Brotassium Man gets his powers from the element potassium. Potassium is the 19th element on the periodic table, and has an atomic mass of 39.1 amu. It has a whooping total of not zero, but one entire valence electron. Now, that is pretty impressive, I know. But what can potassium do? Well, what can't it do! Actually, it can't do a lot of things...it can't be exposed to oxygen or water or it will burst into purple flames. But it does make a great plant fertilizer! In conclusion, potassium is a pretty cool element, and Brotassium Man is the best superhero in all of existence. He is the bro that everyone wants to be bros with, the man that every man wish he could be and who every woman (and lets face it every man) wants to marry. I guess that means he has quite a mass ap-peel! All hail Brotassium man! (and if you don't he will give you a mild stroke)
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